Bloggone!

Erm... Hello?? Wossgoin' on? I wrote a really funny blog entry here last week. It was all about pheasants and football and demoing songs or something. But It's not here and I've lost the will to live. Nearly. Anyway, I'd better go as Lex is due to write something really funny and not-at-all pointless about last nights practice soon. Bye bye. Carts!

The World the way it shouldn't be.

Not only a cunning reference to Balustrade's stonking new indie-rock anthem, but also the state of affairs that our intrepid balladeers found themselves in at practice last night. The world certainly wasn't the way it was suppsoed to be as, when arriving for practice, disaster hit the Alpine Studios and the kettle broke! How would the creative juices flow without suitable lubrication?!

Quick to blame it on the other tennants at Alpine Towers, the crisis was soon averted when Lex's Irish Pixie man-servant charged to the rescue and, placating the diva-ish tendancy of Cart's (who was gearing up for a full-on creative strop) managed to save the day by 'putting a pot on'. Whatever he did, this miraculously produced 2 mugs of fine brown music-juice, although the boys were forced to slum it with ordinary 'builders' tea instead of the usual 'lapdance-poo-pong' that Cart's has developed quite the taste for in recent months However the boys battled through the hardships, and without even the luxury of a chocolate biscuit, proceeded to finish work on the titular indie rock masterpiece as well as giving a good buffing to newly re-discovered classic track, the Troubadour's Lament.

To prevent any more unpleasant outbursts next week from the sensitive artistes that comprise the mighty Balustrade, we here at UKB records are setting up a new charity, Tea Aid. Any donations of tea making equipment will be welcomingly recieved, as will cash donations, (made payable to 'Lex' at the usual address). Please help these dry mouthed musicians, and make the world a better place, not only for the children of the world, but our children's children, and their children's children and even their children's cousins' family friends that they call family even though they aren't.

Please give generously and until next time,

Nigel

It's All Over...

That’s it. The song-writing process is over. Whilst watching a Northern God-botherer win the Smokin’N’Snooker Cup on the telly, Balustrade last night released a press release to the effect that they can’t be bothered to write any more songs and may as well just record what they’ve got and bloomin’ well get on with it…
The lads have two releases planned. The first fruits of their recent labours will be realized in the form of FourSeasons, an EP type thing featuring four tracks, hopefully out in the summer or thereabouts.
1. Summer Days
2. The Troubadours Lament
3. The Harvest Song
4. Winter Nights

All four of these songs will also feature on the debut album, alt.westcountry volume one, apart from The Troubadours Lament which won’t. Got that?
Summer Days is the lead track, with The Troubadour's Lament represneting Spring, The Harvest Song representing Autumn and Winter Nights bigging it up for... erm... Winter

Alt.westcountry volume one (which is starting to look like a bit of a dodgy title) has been tentatively penciled in for a very late 2005 release (more likely March 2006…) and will feature 12 tracks. Here, for the very first time, we can exclusively reveal the songs that have made the cut and the likely order that they’ll appear on the album…

1. PROLOGUE
2. WEST COUNTRY BLUES
3. SUMMER DAYS (The lead track on the next single)
4. DREAM THE DREAM
5. THE WORLD THE WAY IT SHOULDN’T BE
6. THE HARVEST SONG
7. SHE SMILES (If Lex ever gets round to finishing it…)
8. WE’LL PLAY IT AGAIN (SOME OTHER DAY)
9. THE WOLF
10. WINTER NIGHTS
11. LOVE SONGS FOR TRAVELLERS
12. ZAIRE

Speaking at pretentious length to nobody in particular, Master Matthew J. Carter (the J is an affectation and stands for nothing) said:
“Of all the songs that we’ve written, there is only one for which there are no current plans. Mojave Steamline was the first track written for the album but, and I think we both feel this, sits kinda awkwardly within the rather pastoral ‘English’ alt.westcountry sound that we’ve forged. We can only hope that the songs sound as good recorded as they do in our heads. I think it’s fair to say that we’ve already put a hell of a lot more work into these songs that we have for either The Stalisfield EP or Balustrade Christmas, and when it comes to recording we ain’t gonna rush it through to ensure a quick release. Make your own jokes.
Stay tuned cats, and we’ll let you know how the live stuff and the recording goes…
Carty von Carts.”

So. There you have it. Bet you can't wait, can you???